CATERPILLAR EYEBROW ARCH – ⭐️⭐️⭐️
A Moment of Comic Genius
The Divine Miss Bette has been on stage, at the newly minted Concourse Lounge in Chatswood, for about an hour. She’s strutted, she’s preened, she’s shocked, she’s delighted. She’s made us laugh. And she’s made us happy.
Now she leans forward from her waist, with one hand on her sparkling left hip. She scans the audience, points at a woman in the second row and asks her name. “Ray Lee” comes back the nervous answer. “And where you from, Ray…Lee?” the Divine Miss Bette pokes and prods. “St Ives Chase“, Ray Lee stutters.
Against a background of sniggers and snorts, the diva starts mocking Snives and all it stands for.
But now the pianist has started playing the Dolly Parton classic, Joelene…
Without missing a beat, The Divine Miss Bette starts belting out:
Ray Lee, Ray Lee, Ray Lee, Ray Leeeee,
Please don’t touch me just because you can…
Ray Lee, Ray Lee, Ray Lee, Ray Leeee,
Please don’t reach out just because you can,
Now you have got a pretty face,
Even though you come from St Ives Chase,
I won’t hold that against you Ray Lee!”
Sitting safely in my unreserved seats at the back of the small venue, I turn to my wife and exclaim, “Wow! That was quick!”
What a Hoot!
The two hours we spent with The Divine Miss Bette was a wow of a time.
Local entertainer, Catherine Alcorn, does a fabulous job embodying all the sass, all the singing chops and all the provocative invective of the real Bette Midler.
She skilfully stays on the right side of that fine line which divides tribute from parody. Which is not an easy feat to pull off when you’re mincing about the stage in a tight dress on high heels.
In between needling those poor souls in the front row, burying a man’s head in her cleavage whilst having a casual conversation with his wife and telling bawdy jokes which a sailor might baulk at telling, Alcorn delivers all of Midler’s classic songs in a voice which celebrates the original.
In the Mood, Boogie Woogie Bugle Boy, Stay With Me Baby and The Rose. The Divine Miss Bette delivers them all with verve and with passion.
The Moment
But then, from nowhere, came a moment of touching poignancy.
Breaking character, the performer announced, in her own (very Australian) accent that she was “Catherine Alcorn from Sydney” and expressed her gratitude that we had come to see her show. She turned to Ray Lee and added, with a laugh, that she, too, grew up in St Ives.
The laughter and applause which followed was broken by a voice at the back of the hall proclaiming that one of Alcorn’s high school teachers was in the audience. The teacher was invited first to stand and then to join her former student on stage. The teacher took control of the microphone, explained her role in Alcorn’s education and said that she enjoyed the show “except for the swearing”.
And then, as planned, The Divine Miss Bette closed the show with Wind Beneath My Wings.
What a moment!
After all the high-octane hilarity, I did not expect to leave The Concourse Lounge with a tear in my eye.
An Unexpected Connection
Given that we were close to the exit, my wife and I were two of the first people to leave the small theatre.
We agreed that a visit to the facilities was wise before our drive home. As we made our way up the hallway, none other than The Divine Miss Bette emerged from backstage and walked towards us.
The post-show excitement still danced in her eyes! They shone like a light.
My wife and I and stopped and gave Alcorn a round of applause as she passed. In a voice brimming with generosity, she thanked us for coming. And she patted me on the shoulder as she passed.
To me, that said so much. Catherine Alcorn had been on stage, just moments earlier, describing how important it was for a performer to connect with an audience. Without an audience, there’s no connection.
I can assure The Divine Miss Bette that she connected with me, both during her thrilling performance, and with that gentle pat on the shoulder as we passed in the hallway.
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